If you feel like a deer in headlights after discovering infidelity in your relationship, this is your invitation to stop spinning and start getting clear for yourself about how to move forward.
The Gain+ Loss Exercises was created by Lauren LaRusso, infidelity specialist and licensed therapist, to walk you through making tangible what you will gain and what you will lose from either staying in, or ending, your marriage after the revelation of your spouse’s affair.
This was the exercise I once needed as a betrayed spouse, but didn't have. So I kept flailing, and looking to my spouse for the answers he didn't have.
Now, I use this exercise with my private clients who feel paralyzed with uncertainty and don't know where to start.
This is a powerful step.
Fear and confusion make it challenging to get clear with yourself about how to move forward in your marriage.
One minute you want to cut and leave; the next you can't imagine leaving the life you've built behind.
Making sense of your many mixed feelings you have around your shared life with your spouse, and how a change will affect everything, are a huge part of what you’re struggling with after betrayal.
With this guided exercise, you'll complete a full inventory of your life, your relationship, and your personal values.
I'll walk you through how to prioritize and sort in a way that will give you greater clarity about committing to a direction, and what's at stake in each.
Infidelity isn't only heartbreaking; it's deeply confusing.
Your life has changed without your choice, and against your will.
And now you have to figure out what to do about it.
This guide will help you find what matters most to you amidst the chaos, so you can move forward with the self-connection and peace of mind that you're making the best decision for YOU.
